How One Conversation Changed A Blemish Into A Beautiful Moment

finding peace in unexpected places

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Wandering Willow is a space for reflection, rewilding, and deep connection—with yourself, nature, and the stories that shape your life. Rooted in Forest Therapy and a passion for storytelling, you'll find musings on nature’s wisdom, the heart’s wild truth, and the journey of remembering who you are.
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In Search of Silence

Summer is so loud.

Dogs barking, lawn mowers mowing, motorcycles revving, weed eaters eating, radios blasting, children screaming.

The world is just so loud in the summer—everything's alive and therefore must be loud.

I notice how I crave the silence and solitude of winter during peak summer. Even though summer is dying down now, and you'd think that it would be more silent, it's not. Maybe it's just that it's a sunny Friday afternoon - an early start to the weekend - that feels so loud.

I have been craving a sabbatical. I've been wanting silence and retreats so badly. For me, I'm not sure exactly what that looks like. I think I just want to be outside with no humans, no planes, no human sounds. Just alone in the forest with only the sounds of the more-than-human world. That would be ideal.

And I'm not sure how far away from home I would have to be. I'm not even sure where I could go at this point that would be relatively easy and affordable and available to me.

A One Day Retreat

I thought for sure going to a local park last Friday would be balm for my soul. I required it.

I got to my favorite spot for putting up a hammock and I noticed a car parked. No people in sight, must be hiking it seemed. It was still kind of early in the day, around 11 AM, and I thought I'd have some good people free time.

Almost as soon as I had my hammock set up, someone pulled in with a dog and started blasting music across the way from me. I wasn't annoyed, but I'd just set up camp and was committed to just being out in nature without my phone, without any responsibility—just giving myself a mental break.

Craving Silence

For the past few weeks, I haven't been wanting anything extra in my head. I've just been craving silence.

I have trouble sleeping and started listening to Yoga Nidra to fall asleep at night for the past 6 months. I have these really cool headband headphones (affiliate link) that I love. Yet, I haven't been putting them on because I haven't wanted someone else's voice in my head talking to me at night.

Not even a person that I know and trust, and really admire. BTW his name is

Alexander Lovell, PhD

and he has incredible Yoga Nidras over on his Substack and also as part of

The Creator Retreat

.

Sometimes it's a little bit harder to sleep than others, but I've been doing it without the Yoga Nidra and it's been nice. It’s been nice not to have something on my head—the headphones can make me a little bit warm despite everything else that I love about them.

It just feels more free, too, to not have headphones and a voice in my ears. I haven't been feeling free in my body, in my space, and this at least gives my ears some freedom, my head some extra space.

The Encounter

Back to the story at the park: I stayed there and it just felt so uncomfortable because I wasn't getting the silence I wanted, and I was annoyed at this person for blasting music and having a dog barking.

Don't get me wrong, I love dogs, but I don't love them barking. Only one of my neighbors has one dog that is quiet, and they're my favorite neighbor and favorite dog—sorry, not sorry.

I walked closer to where this person was with their dog because they were right next to the bathroom. The noise got even louder as I walked to the bathroom. When I came out, his dog came at me.

It was a really tiny dachshund dog. I'm not generally afraid of dogs, even though maybe I should be—they could do some damage, even the small ones. And the small ones are usually much more aggressive, something I learned after working at PetSmart as my first job.

His dog came at me and he said, "She's friendly, she won't bite."

I don't mind dogs and I would pet a dog if given the chance. This little dachshund came at me. The owner said she was nice, and he walked over as well. He introduced himself and his dog. She was very cute and tiny.

I was just amazed at how small she was because she was smaller than both of our cats- even our smaller, sleek gray boy Han. It’s weird to me when people have dogs that are smaller than our cats. I feel like cats should be smaller than dogs, not the other way around. I’m built different I guess.

An Uncomfortable Question

This man started a whole new turn of events for me because I had this weird feeling all day. I didn’t feel safe in my body and I just felt like prey. Then I meet this man and he says, "Are you alone?"

I don't know what is wrong with my brain, but I'm not capable of lying. I'm a terrible liar. I don't think it's right to lie—I have very strong feelings about lying, so it's extremely difficult for me to lie even if it would make my life easier.

I noticed a part of me that didn't want to say the truth, but the truth part overrode and said, "Yes, I'm alone." And the rest of me heard it come out of my mouth and thought OK, we need to fix this.

I continued, "Yeah, I'm alone. I couldn’t convince my husband to call off work today and come here with me."—basically letting him know that there's someone out there that knows my location and cares about me. A subtle way to express: please don't murder me.

Then he asked if I had any friends, and I wanted to say, "Not really." Because I don’t have a ton of friends locally, they are all across the planet. None within driving distance. But I do have one friend locally. I'm really proud of that one friend.

But she was busy, and I mean, that's the case, right? I'm a midlife woman—most people do not have time, energy, or means to go out during the day on a Friday. And I consider myself extremely lucky that I'm able to live in this way.

I told him that my friends were busy. Just totally reinforcing that I'm out here alone. To a stranger that I just met.

A Surprising Turn

The man said he knows how busy people are, and that's why he has a dog. His dog can't say no to going somewhere—she doesn't have a schedule, so she can come camping with him anytime he wants.

Things turned into a really nice conversation, and I didn't get pulled in for too long. It was kind of cool to meet a stranger, even though I wasn't feeling safe in my body and projected that onto this man.

It was good to have the connective experience of meeting a stranger-chatting and getting to know just a little bit about someone's life.

After our chat, I found the radio had become simple background noise and his dog lovely in her curious and protective nature.

I was able to humanize this man by talking with him. Before we met, he was a blemish on my day. After chatting, I realized he is just another person seeking refuge from a life we never considered might be ours, but it is.

Rooted Word Circle

🌿 The next Rooted Word Circle is coming soon!
Join me on Wednesday, August 27th at 12:00 p.m. EDT for a 30-minute guided writing exploration.
August’s theme is “Joy as Service”—an invitation to explore how joy can be both sacred and supportive, a gift we offer ourselves and the world.

Bring your journal, a cozy drink, and your wild heart. 💫

Click the button below to find out more and sign up for Rooted Word Circle :

Thank you for reading! If this resonated, let me know in the comments or replying to this email. Your comments mean the world to me, and really keep me going. I’m endlessly grateful for that.

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Wandering onward,
Sam
Wandering Willow 🌿
Reconnecting Through Nature